Pull your sh*t together!

I'm sitting here in my gym wear writing this post. I should be at the gym, I want to be at the gym and yet my body has other ideas. I've cried through frustration this morning. And as I was told to "pull your shit together" the tears flowed more and anger set in. It hit a nerve and so now I'm a "crazy bitch" too.

I know it wasn't meant to be nasty. I know it was just trying to get me motivated to get to the gym and to stop feeling so frustrated that my body hasn't let up on pain for the last 3 days. Every day I've wanted to get to the gym and every day I've had to give in and watch others do what I want to be doing.

I've learnt more than ever that I have to listen to my body and not push myself too hard. But do you know how frustrating that is?! To watch everyone around you do what you want? To watch people never be able to understand the feelings you have because you have this rotten disease that is eating you from the inside? Its not just as simple as pulling your shit together when it feels like you are being stabbed. Or your head is pounding. Or the nausea is there. If only it were.

Yes some days I can pull it together, say screw you and work through it but others you just can't. Today I can't.

You will never understand until you are living with it. So don't judge me.

A

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